Technical Confidence vs. Fitness Confidence
It figures, just as I'm about to do a major push to get some writing done on Spring Live, I wake up with a cold. It was bound to happen since Abbie and Julie are already in the midst of it. For some reason, I thought I could avoid it.
Three years ago, as I was entering into independent consulting, I could've avoided it. Back then, I was in shape and riding my bike all the time. When I first started as an independent, I had no time to exercise, but I was in such good shape that it took me well over a month to start gaining any weight. That summer was awful - I had no time to exercise and the commute was around an hour. But the pay was awesome and the technology was even cooler. It was summer 2001 and because of my new contract, I was learning all about JUnit, Ant, TDD and Struts.
Reflecting back on that summer, and the past couple of years, I seem to go through various levels of "confidence." There are two extremes for me, and I tend to reside in one or the other. The first is "technical confidence" and the second is "fitness confidence." When I'm coding like a madman, learning new stuff, and deploying release - I'm very technically confident. I don't feel like I need to learn anything new. I feel like I'm on the right track, and I'm generally pretty happy. This is, until I leave the computer. When I start interacting with my family and friends, I start to realize how out of shape I am. In order to get things done, I tend to give up exercising. Part of it is because its easy to give up, and sometimes I just feel guilty leaving Julie to run off and exercise - especially when she's pregnant with a sick kid in her arms.
In order for me to get in shape, it takes quite a bit. In the past when I've been in shape, I usually ride my bike 6 days a week. This is a time consuming effort, averaging about 2 hours per day. However, after I've done this for about a month, my "fitness confidence" starts to rise and I really enjoy being outside or working out. The downside is that when I find time to sit down at the computer, I see a flurry of e-mail and blogs about cool new technologies. My technical confidence plummets.
It's weird. I wish I could find a balance. I wish I had more drive to improve my fitness confidence right now. Unfortunately, many deadlines are looming and I need to sit here in front of the computer to get them done. I definitely need to turn this around. Health is one of the most important things in the world, and I'm so out of shape its pathetic.